


Count Your Blessings

by zebraljb



Series: 2019 Advent Ficlet Challenge [3]
Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Dinner, M/M, Miscommunication
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-03
Updated: 2019-12-03
Packaged: 2021-02-27 01:13:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,749
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21658912
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zebraljb/pseuds/zebraljb
Summary: Merlin and Eggsy both plan on two extra seats at their Christmas table, having invited friends who will be alone on Christmas. They just haven't bothered to communicate about who those two friends are.Tristan is fancast as Andrew Scott. Percival is fancast as Daniel Craig.
Relationships: Merlin/Gary "Eggsy" Unwin
Series: 2019 Advent Ficlet Challenge [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1560508
Comments: 11
Kudos: 68
Collections: 2019 Advent Ficlet Challenge





	Count Your Blessings

**Author's Note:**

> Advent prompt #3 - The More the Merrier
> 
> Teen & up rating for talk of sex toys

“So, Galahad…what will you be doing for the holiday?” Tristan reloads his gun and darts around a corner.

“Oh, me and Merlin will be spending a quiet day at home, I think.” Eggsy ducks and shoots twice. “Usually spend it with my mum and sister, but they’re visiting family in Wales this year. Invited me, but…they’re a more conservative side of the family. Dunno how they’d feel about two blokes shacking up, and I’m not lying about Merlin to anyone.”

“Good man.” Tristan peeks around the corner, nods, and they move down the hall.

“How about you?”

“Well, my father passed years ago, and my mother died this summer. I’m an only child…an aunt invited me over but I know it was out of pity, not any sort of actual affection. I’ll probably heat something up and relax with a good book. Or I might volunteer for a mission, let a family man stay home.”

Eggsy actually stops walking. “Jesus, bruv, I didn’t know about your mum…I’m real sorry.”

“Thank you, Galahad, but it’s quite all right. I was in Cologne when it happened, so I was unable to return for the service.”

“Three men coming in on your left,” Merlin barks in their ears and they stop talking.

Four hours later they find themselves tired and successful on the jet. Eggsy loosens his tie and holds up his glass. “To your mum, Tristan.”

“To Mum.” Tristan smiles sadly and holds up his own glass.

“Hey, listen. We got tons of room, and we always make more than we need. Come to ours on Christmas.”

“Oh, Galahad, I couldn’t impose…”

“You’re not imposing, I’m inviting you! Hate the thought of you sitting around alone on Christmas, and we ain’t really hung out much.” Eggsy winces as the old speech comes through. “Know Merlin won’t mind…you’re one of the agents he likes.”

“That IS a compliment,” Tristan says with a grin. “All right, that sounds lovely. Thank you for the invitation.”

“You’re welcome.” Eggsy reclines his chair and settles in for a bit of a nap.

“That pompous arrogant twat!” Harry storms into Merlin’s office without knocking.

“Arthur,” Merlin says respectfully. “What have the agents done now?”

“Not the agents…my ridiculous Uncle Andrew.” Merlin points to a chair but Harry just paces. “Every year he and Aunt Agatha host a charming Christmas dinner. Perfect decorations, perfect meal, perfectly insincere family gathering. But this year they’ve decided to go to Aruba for the holiday. Without informing anyone until today. As if we can just conjure up alternate Christmas plans out of thin air!”

“This isn’t the end of the world, Harry. Ye dinnae even LIKE your family.”

“True, but my routine!” Harry all but wails. “Now I’ll be stuck at home, eating beans out of a can or something…”

Merlin rolls his eyes at his best friend’s theatrics. “Have dinner with us,” Merlin suggests. “Eggsy loves ye, of course, and there is always room for one more. His family won’t be there, we’d love to have ye.”

“Are you quite certain? I wouldn’t wish to inconvenience you.”

“Harry, ye inconvenience me every day of my life,” Merlin says, but he smiles as he says it. “You’re my oldest friend and like a father to Eggsy. Please come.”

“All right,” Harry says. “Thank you. If I’m like a father to Eggsy…does that make me your father-in-law?”

“Kindly fuck off, Arthur.”

“Yield.”

“Ain’t yielding shit.” Eggsy struggles on his back like a flipped turtle, both hands gripping one of Roxy’s slender wrists. Her fist is pressed into his windpipe and he’s gasping for air.

“Yield, knave!” She shouts with a triumphant cackle. “Admit defeat!”

“You’re a crazy bitch…and I fucking yield, Jesus.” She gets off his chest and bounces around in delight, ponytail swinging. Eggsy slowly rolls into a sitting position, coughing and panting for breath. “You don’t gotta be such an arse about it, ain’t like you won an Olympic medal.”

“I pinned you. Again. Every time is like the first time!” Roxy beams at him and he cannot help but beam back. He loves his best mate.

“So…any ideas what to get Merlin for Christmas? Every year I think he’ll be easy, but he isn’t. Got everything he needs, and what he don’t got, he builds.”

“Supplies?”

“Wouldn’t know where to begin.”

“Sex toys?” Roxy winks at him.

“Drawer is FULL. Maybe a new set of drawers,” he muses. “Something we can slide under the bed? That way we can just reach down and grab lube, or a plug, or…”

“Ugh, stop.” Roxy shudders. “It’s like listening to my mother talk about sex.”

“Did I ever tell ya he’s a bottom?” Eggsy whispers. “He loves it when I…”

“Euuw, Eggsy, stop!” Roxy shrieks, putting her hands over her ears.

“That’s what you get for doing a victory dance around me,” Eggsy says with a cocky grin.

“Speaking of my mother, I got my monthly Phone Call of Disappointment yesterday. All the time she put in to raising me right, giving me every opportunity, and I am ‘only a tailor.’” Roxy makes air quotes. “So needless to say I won’t be heading home for Christmas.”

“Rox,” Eggsy says in astonishment. “What will you do?”

Roxy shrugs. “Eat ice cream. Watch rom-coms. I’ll come up with something.”

“Come over for dinner,” Eggsy says immediately. He hasn’t spoken to Merlin yet about Tristan, but what’s one more chair at the table? “Me and Merlin are cooking, gonna be aces. Love to have my best mate there, too.”

“I’d like that,” Roxy says with a smile. “Thank you.”

“Gotta bring a gift,” Eggsy tells her. “Something for the new sex drawer. Merlin’s partial to the metallic dildos, not the rubber ones.”

“Prat!” Roxy punches him in the stomach and stalks away.

“I have completed my bi-monthly investigation of the armory,” Percival announces to Merlin. “There are three weapons that I feel should probably be pulled from rotation. I will look at them more carefully over the next few days, practice with them, take detailed notes.”

“Thank ye, Percival.” Merlin tries to smile at the man, although he’s never been able to understand his fascination with weapons. He’s not scared of Percival in any way, it’s just that the man is devoted to the Kingsman rifles and revolvers the same way Harry is devoted to his butterflies. “I appreciate ye taking your time to do this.”

“Never a problem, Merlin. I feel that our weapons are an extension of our hands and arms. If something would go wrong, it could cause the end of a mission as well as the end of an agent.”

“Indeed.” Merlin nods in agreement. “I hope ye dinnae plan to practice on Wednesday. Take a break.”

“Why would I need a break on Wednesday, sir?” Even though Percival, Harry and Merlin came to Kingsman within eighteen months of each other, Percival has called Merlin ‘sir’ ever since his elevation to the position.

“Well, for Christmas dinner, of course. I would assume ye will be spending time with loved ones, opening gaudily wrapped gifts, sipping at hot chocolate, listening to carols…”

“You would be mistaken to assume that, sir.” Percival stands even straighter. “I was raised in an orphanage, as you know, and was never close to the family who fostered me. I have no one to exchange gifts with, I do not like chocolate, and as for music…I can do without.”

“Well.” Merlin blinks up at him and makes a split-second decision, one he knows his warm-hearted boyfriend would approve of. “Ye cannae work with the weapons on Wednesday, because ye will be having dinner with us.”

“I will?” It’s Percival’s turn to blink.

“Yes. We have more than enough room, and I dinnae like to think of ye here by yourself. Ye will nae be required to participate in any sort of social interaction if ye dinnae wish…just come to a place where ye will be welcomed and fed.”

Percival thinks for a moment. “You are quite kind, Merlin, and Galahad is a good man. I will attend.”

“Excellent.”

“All right.” Eggsy frowns at his pencil and paper. “So, that’s potatoes…I’ll take care of the stuffing, you said you’ll work on the brussel sprouts…just gotta decide what size turkey to get.”

“Well, four people…let’s see.” Merlin scrolls through his phone. “This says somewhere around five kilos?”

“Four people?” Eggsy stares at Merlin. “You talked to Roxy, then? Tristan, too? Sorry I didn’t ask you first, but…”

“Roxy and Tristan?” Merlin stares back. “Nae, lad, ye mean Harry and Percival.”

“Harry’s always welcome here, of course, but Percival? I don’t talk to Percival!”

“Well, I do, and I invited him for dinner. He would be completely alone, and that isn’t right. And Harry’s family made alternate plans…he was peacocking about and I had to shut him up.” Merlin leans back in his chair. “What’s this about Roxy and Tristan?”

“Tristan’s parents are gone, and he was gonna just sit around at home. His mum just died a few months ago! And Roxy’s mum is being an utter twat about her life choices, so I asked her over. She’s my best mate,” Eggsy says defensively. “Figured you wouldn’t care.”

“Well, I figured YOU wouldn’t care.” They glare at each other.

“This is ridiculous,” Eggsy finally says. “Why are we arguing? Is this the worst thing that’s gonna happen to us this year…we have too many friends to invite for Christmas dinner?”

“Ye are right, lad,” Merlin says with a sigh. He pushes back from the table, pats his lap, and Eggsy eagerly comes over to straddle his legs. “That was very thoughtful of ye to invite Roxy and Tristan. He is a very good man, and it was sad for him to lose his mother this year.”

“Knew you had a big heart under all that grump and jumper,” Eggsy says with a grin, nibbling along Merlin’s strong jaw. “Might be nice to try and get to know Percival outside work.”

“Aye, he has had a hard life and it might do him good to be around someone as friendly and kind as you.” Merlin kisses him. “We are quite lucky, aren’t we?”

“Too fucking right we are.” Eggsy wriggles on his lap, snogs him within an inch of his life, and they soon forget about the full dining room they’ll be having on Christmas Day.


End file.
